This is probably an old song, but I think I'm just hearing it recently, even though the first time I heard it, it felt very familiar. But maybe that's just a quality of a great song. Anyway...my favorite is in bold.
"In Christ alone my hope is found; He is my light, my strength, my song. This cornerstone, this solid ground, firm through the fiercest drought or storm. What heighths of love?! What depths of peace!? When fears are still, when striving cease, my Comforter, my All in All. Here in the love of Christ, I stand.
"In Christ alone Who put on flesh, fullness of God in helpless babe. This gift of love and righteousness scorned by the ones He came to save. 'Til on that cross as Jesus died, the wrath of God was satisfied, for every sin on Him was laid. Here in the death of Christ, I live.
"There in the ground His body lay, Light of the world by darkness slain. Then bursting forth in glorious day, up from the grave He rose again. And as He stands in victory sin's curse has lost its grip on me, for I am His, and He is mine, bought with the precious blood of Christ.
"No guilt in life, no fear in death, this is the power of Christ in me. From life's first cry 'til final breath, Jesus commands my destiny. No power of hell, no scheme of man can ever pluck me from His hand. 'Til He returns or calls me home, here in the power of Christ, I'll stand."
Sunday, July 02, 2006
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
A note on updates...
Unfortunately, I only get the opportunity get onto the internet once or twice a week. (Really, I'm just too cheap to get internet at my apt.) Anyway...it just means that when I update, it's a bunch of stuff. Perhaps it's a good lesson for me to think through what I want to say instead of continually putting one or both feet in my mouth or saying the first stupid or silly thing that comes into my head. This way, it's the second or third stupid or silly thing that comes out. ;-)
From my garden...
Here is a sample from my small garden on my balcony. Really, it's the only flower. My peony is finally growing up through the dirt, so I can tell it will be a very long time before it blooms. And my banana tree has already doubled in height! Everything else is just green, but I can't wait to have all that green indoors in the winter.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Wedding Photos...
Recently, Mom and I were able to salvage her wedding album from the storage shed. I'm SO glad we were able to save them!! And I'm SO glad that we have things like scanners and printers and memory sticks, so I don't have to worry about losing them! Anyway...can you tell I belong to this cute couple?
By the way...HELLO 1972!!
By the way...HELLO 1972!!
Sunday, June 11, 2006
A broken neck? To God be the glory!!!
Well...many things have transpired since I last wrote. Let me start by saying, as some of you may already know, Mom's breast cancer is back and has spread. She has been taking a hormone that, by the grace and direction of God, has been working in shrinking the tumors. We went for a PET and a CT scan last Friday, and she got the good news of the size decrease on Tuesday. She also received a panicked plea from her oncologist to immediately put on her neck brace (from her surgery in '03) and see a neurosurgeon the next day. So off we went...
At the neurosurgeon's office, the neurologist came in, told us that it appears on the CT that C2 (the second vetebrae in the spine) had collapsed and sent a large fragment of bone into the spinal canal where the spinal cord likes to stay. (Mom fell in April in the kitchen while climbing over a dog-gate.) She said that Mom would more than likely need surgery to correct this. She then took Mom away to take some x-rays, while I broke down in the room. Sometimes, one just cries almost as if it were a reflex. When you feel that old pain and fear, you cry. Then, after the x-rays were consulted over, the surgeon came in to talk to us. He stated that if any other vertebrae had broken, she would have immediately been a quadraplegic. As it just so happens, (which I know how it just so happened) the area around the spinal cord in that one spot, is two to three times the space needed by the spinal cord, so that as it stands now, Mom is still up and walking and feeling almost two months after shattering C2. He also told us that the fracture is healing and is stable at this point in time, but she is to wear her brace for the next three to six months. As he was sharing this information, I again began to cry, but this time not because of fear. This time, tears of absolute gratitude and awe at what God has done were shed.
Mom and I were in shock the rest of the day, and each time I share the story, I am still (almost) speechless. I mean...Can anyone doubt God's hand over my Mom? Can anyone ignore the gravity of what has happened? People have said, "How lucky!" and I want to scream, "It's not luck!!!!" It is because the God who orders the planets and the seasons, the God who created the heavens and the earth, the God Most High reached out his hand and had mercy over my Mom's life. Out of His love for her, He spared her from this...this...I can even find the right word for what it would have been. I can't praise Him enough for this love and mercy! To God be the glory!!
Mom says that people have said to her, "Why didn't God keep you from falling?" Her reply: "God does not always protect us from our own stupidity." She has also said that, as if it wasn't clear enough that she was walking around on this planet by the grace of God, she is now a billboard. (She's a little self-conscious of the collar, as we would all be.) And even though when we look at each other now, knowing how uncomfortable the collar is, and what a hassle it is to catch a ride to and from work and to every other place you want to go, we also know what a blessing it is to be able to wear this uncomfortable collar that interferes with every aspect of your day, because it means you can continue to walk, and feel the fabric of your socks, and type, and feed yourself each day. We have truly been blessed. I do not pretend to even begin to understand the goodness of God. I really don't. We have not deserved this kindness. I know I have been so very weak with every little challenge. I have failed Him in SO many ways. And yet, He chooses to bless us? I don't understand, but I am humbly grateful. Praise and glory to God!! Thank You, Lord, for Your mercy!
At the neurosurgeon's office, the neurologist came in, told us that it appears on the CT that C2 (the second vetebrae in the spine) had collapsed and sent a large fragment of bone into the spinal canal where the spinal cord likes to stay. (Mom fell in April in the kitchen while climbing over a dog-gate.) She said that Mom would more than likely need surgery to correct this. She then took Mom away to take some x-rays, while I broke down in the room. Sometimes, one just cries almost as if it were a reflex. When you feel that old pain and fear, you cry. Then, after the x-rays were consulted over, the surgeon came in to talk to us. He stated that if any other vertebrae had broken, she would have immediately been a quadraplegic. As it just so happens, (which I know how it just so happened) the area around the spinal cord in that one spot, is two to three times the space needed by the spinal cord, so that as it stands now, Mom is still up and walking and feeling almost two months after shattering C2. He also told us that the fracture is healing and is stable at this point in time, but she is to wear her brace for the next three to six months. As he was sharing this information, I again began to cry, but this time not because of fear. This time, tears of absolute gratitude and awe at what God has done were shed.
Mom and I were in shock the rest of the day, and each time I share the story, I am still (almost) speechless. I mean...Can anyone doubt God's hand over my Mom? Can anyone ignore the gravity of what has happened? People have said, "How lucky!" and I want to scream, "It's not luck!!!!" It is because the God who orders the planets and the seasons, the God who created the heavens and the earth, the God Most High reached out his hand and had mercy over my Mom's life. Out of His love for her, He spared her from this...this...I can even find the right word for what it would have been. I can't praise Him enough for this love and mercy! To God be the glory!!
Mom says that people have said to her, "Why didn't God keep you from falling?" Her reply: "God does not always protect us from our own stupidity." She has also said that, as if it wasn't clear enough that she was walking around on this planet by the grace of God, she is now a billboard. (She's a little self-conscious of the collar, as we would all be.) And even though when we look at each other now, knowing how uncomfortable the collar is, and what a hassle it is to catch a ride to and from work and to every other place you want to go, we also know what a blessing it is to be able to wear this uncomfortable collar that interferes with every aspect of your day, because it means you can continue to walk, and feel the fabric of your socks, and type, and feed yourself each day. We have truly been blessed. I do not pretend to even begin to understand the goodness of God. I really don't. We have not deserved this kindness. I know I have been so very weak with every little challenge. I have failed Him in SO many ways. And yet, He chooses to bless us? I don't understand, but I am humbly grateful. Praise and glory to God!! Thank You, Lord, for Your mercy!
Saturday, April 15, 2006
The Minutiae of Healing...
I was thinking this morning, and I guess a little over the last couple of days, about healing. There is so much that goes into healing that just isn't expressed by saying, "He made the blind to see, the lame to walk, and the dead to live again."
Skin, for example...Normal skin takes a few days to heal. (7-10 and sometimes longer if you want the exact numbers.) First, there is a cut. A blood clot forms in the cut because it is exposed to collagen fibers in the surrounding tissues. As various cellular hormones, etc. are expressed, that clot becomes granulation tissue. Granulation tissue is fairly nerve/pain free, but it is very vascular. Believe it or not, this makes it great at fighting off infection. It then becomes the lattice on which the basal layer of skin cells can creep across until the two edges meet. Once that occurs, it can slowly fill in the gap, going from that sensitive "baby" skin to the kind that was there before the wound occurred. A small scar is most always left behind, especially if the basal layer of skin was separated.
As for vision...There are SO many things and differences and pathways involving the eyes. First of all, depending on what side of your eye an object is visible, it may stay visible to the ipsilateral (same) side of the brain or cross over to the contralateral (opposite) side of the brain from where you "see" it. There are areas of the brain which store visual images which only took you nanoseconds to visualize, then an immediate assessment of depth, distance, and travel velocity are calculated so you can miss the fist coming at your face, or something like it. There are areas that detect movement in the stillest of environments (FYI: these areas are huge in prey animals, because they are always looking for their lurking enemy.) The retina has areas that detect the amount of light and the color of the light wave. (If matter is matter and doesn't change, and light is both a wave and particle, and you see something as blue that I see as aquamarine, then what color is it really? It's a question I've asked since high school physics...yes, I guess I truly am a geek.) The retina then transfers all that information via two major pathways, one that crosses, and one that doesn't, and your brain puts the whole image together. Did I mention that the lens flips the image upside down and then somehow between your retina and your brain it gets flipped back right-side up? Also, there are small muscles in charge of your lens attachments in the eye. They contract (involuntarily!) to focus both far and near. All of this occurs without your even thinking about it. How we translate what we are seeing into what is real takes awhile to develop. People say that babies best see primary colors and are near sighted as they are newborns, and they slowly develop the ability to de-fuzz who that is standing over them as they get older. Along with the seeing comes the perception associated with that image. It's all very intricate.
People who've injured limbs or had prolonged brain injury must undergo lengthy physical therapy in order to build up strength, tone, balance, and fine motor control all over again. (I actually just deleted a long section from this very spot about the spinal cord, injuries, and the daschund. You can thank me later.) Ultimately, what I mean to point out is that muscle atrophy, either by disuse or because of lack of nervous stimulation, is very hard to combat. There are muscle fibers which are best suited to sprinting (aka. endurance fibers.) There are some dedicated to strength (aka. bulky fibers.) There are whole muscle groups devoted to keeping your balance while standing up straight on level ground. These fibers, their nervous pathways, the perception of what is being sensed and is really happening, and the coordination of movement is something that we slowly develop as we learn to flip over, rock back and forth on our hands and knees, crawl, walk, run, and then skip or dance. It takes YEARS for us to develop these skills and strengths. For example, there are no 2 year old prodigy prima dona's in the Moscow Ballet.
Finally...I can't speak to human medicine in this area, but I was taught in school that if you really want to resuscitate an animal via CPCR (they've changed it to cardiopulmonary cerebral resuscitation, because it is no use to bring back the heart and lungs if the brain is dead), then you must open the chest and do manual cardiac massage within 60 seconds of arrest. We can pump them full of drugs, shock them with a few hundred volts, and we can get a pulse back. But if the brain is without oxygen for mere minutes, irreversible damage occurs. Nervous cells don't like to regenerate. They die and deteriorate very quickly. And as we all know, the brain is the control panel for every function in your body. There are even reflexes set in place that will try to protect your brain in the event of trauma, etc. (I'm talking about shifts in your blood pressure, even in the face of stress, that attempt to keep your brain from swelling more than has already occurred.)
I give you this long-winded science lesson to say that when God heals a leper and makes them whole, or when the paralytic stands up, picks up his pallet, and walks out, or when the blind man washes the mud from his eyes and sees, just what a miracle has truly occurred. God is sovereign even over the smallest cells in our bodies. He orchestrates and puts into being pathways and perceptions that our brain usually takes years to put into habit. It just amazes me that our Creator is in control of EVERY detail. Nothing is left out. When He heals, He heals COMPLETELY and FULLY. I know that right now, I'm speaking mostly of His ability to heal us physically, but the spiritually implications are just as real. He CAN make the blind man to see, the lame man to walk, and the dead to rise again. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, MARVELOUS are Thy works, and that my souls knows well. Praise God for his infinite wisdom, design, and control.
Skin, for example...Normal skin takes a few days to heal. (7-10 and sometimes longer if you want the exact numbers.) First, there is a cut. A blood clot forms in the cut because it is exposed to collagen fibers in the surrounding tissues. As various cellular hormones, etc. are expressed, that clot becomes granulation tissue. Granulation tissue is fairly nerve/pain free, but it is very vascular. Believe it or not, this makes it great at fighting off infection. It then becomes the lattice on which the basal layer of skin cells can creep across until the two edges meet. Once that occurs, it can slowly fill in the gap, going from that sensitive "baby" skin to the kind that was there before the wound occurred. A small scar is most always left behind, especially if the basal layer of skin was separated.
As for vision...There are SO many things and differences and pathways involving the eyes. First of all, depending on what side of your eye an object is visible, it may stay visible to the ipsilateral (same) side of the brain or cross over to the contralateral (opposite) side of the brain from where you "see" it. There are areas of the brain which store visual images which only took you nanoseconds to visualize, then an immediate assessment of depth, distance, and travel velocity are calculated so you can miss the fist coming at your face, or something like it. There are areas that detect movement in the stillest of environments (FYI: these areas are huge in prey animals, because they are always looking for their lurking enemy.) The retina has areas that detect the amount of light and the color of the light wave. (If matter is matter and doesn't change, and light is both a wave and particle, and you see something as blue that I see as aquamarine, then what color is it really? It's a question I've asked since high school physics...yes, I guess I truly am a geek.) The retina then transfers all that information via two major pathways, one that crosses, and one that doesn't, and your brain puts the whole image together. Did I mention that the lens flips the image upside down and then somehow between your retina and your brain it gets flipped back right-side up? Also, there are small muscles in charge of your lens attachments in the eye. They contract (involuntarily!) to focus both far and near. All of this occurs without your even thinking about it. How we translate what we are seeing into what is real takes awhile to develop. People say that babies best see primary colors and are near sighted as they are newborns, and they slowly develop the ability to de-fuzz who that is standing over them as they get older. Along with the seeing comes the perception associated with that image. It's all very intricate.
People who've injured limbs or had prolonged brain injury must undergo lengthy physical therapy in order to build up strength, tone, balance, and fine motor control all over again. (I actually just deleted a long section from this very spot about the spinal cord, injuries, and the daschund. You can thank me later.) Ultimately, what I mean to point out is that muscle atrophy, either by disuse or because of lack of nervous stimulation, is very hard to combat. There are muscle fibers which are best suited to sprinting (aka. endurance fibers.) There are some dedicated to strength (aka. bulky fibers.) There are whole muscle groups devoted to keeping your balance while standing up straight on level ground. These fibers, their nervous pathways, the perception of what is being sensed and is really happening, and the coordination of movement is something that we slowly develop as we learn to flip over, rock back and forth on our hands and knees, crawl, walk, run, and then skip or dance. It takes YEARS for us to develop these skills and strengths. For example, there are no 2 year old prodigy prima dona's in the Moscow Ballet.
Finally...I can't speak to human medicine in this area, but I was taught in school that if you really want to resuscitate an animal via CPCR (they've changed it to cardiopulmonary cerebral resuscitation, because it is no use to bring back the heart and lungs if the brain is dead), then you must open the chest and do manual cardiac massage within 60 seconds of arrest. We can pump them full of drugs, shock them with a few hundred volts, and we can get a pulse back. But if the brain is without oxygen for mere minutes, irreversible damage occurs. Nervous cells don't like to regenerate. They die and deteriorate very quickly. And as we all know, the brain is the control panel for every function in your body. There are even reflexes set in place that will try to protect your brain in the event of trauma, etc. (I'm talking about shifts in your blood pressure, even in the face of stress, that attempt to keep your brain from swelling more than has already occurred.)
I give you this long-winded science lesson to say that when God heals a leper and makes them whole, or when the paralytic stands up, picks up his pallet, and walks out, or when the blind man washes the mud from his eyes and sees, just what a miracle has truly occurred. God is sovereign even over the smallest cells in our bodies. He orchestrates and puts into being pathways and perceptions that our brain usually takes years to put into habit. It just amazes me that our Creator is in control of EVERY detail. Nothing is left out. When He heals, He heals COMPLETELY and FULLY. I know that right now, I'm speaking mostly of His ability to heal us physically, but the spiritually implications are just as real. He CAN make the blind man to see, the lame man to walk, and the dead to rise again. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, MARVELOUS are Thy works, and that my souls knows well. Praise God for his infinite wisdom, design, and control.
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